It's Time

Over indulgence. Something we overlook in our society. For some it is a socially acceptable way of life. We look upon those who have an abundance of 'stuff' with envy. I want the bigger house, the newer car, the updated wardrobe, the self indulgence. For others' the indulgence is looked upon as contemptible. For me, it's food. My lack of self control is glaringly obvious to anyone who sees me. I've fought this battle before. I've had victories and failures. I go around and 'round this issue.

The time is now. No more will I continue to eat until I am beyond stuffed. I will not serve self. I will honor my body. I want to live healthy. I don't want my family to suffer if I become diabetic, die of heart disease or any of the other health related issues associated with obesity. There I said it, obese.

Years ago, I noticed that my family doctor had written the word 'obese' on my patient file. I was offended. Okay, so I'm a little overweight. Soft, fluffy, curvaceous, insulated, voluptuous, warm... The best adjective in the world does not cover the fact that I am obese, fat, a BMI of 36.7. No more fun adjectives. No more excuses. The time is now.

I am now two weeks into Weight Watchers. This is my 3rd time through. This time I will not quit when it gets hard. I won't make excuses for skipping the meetings. My time on this planet is short and I want to spend it enjoying the family God gave me. I want to walk and not be weary, to run and not faint. To be a new me. A new me more energy.

If you don't want the details, stop reading now. When we got married I was overweight at 140 lbs. When I had Diane I was 250 lbs. Now at 38 years old I am 227lbs. My healthy weight is suppose to be between 124-155lbs. That is 72-103lbs to lose. I'd love to reach my healthy weight by my 40th birthday.

This journey is about a lot more than eating right. I have to stop eating in secret. To stop wolfing it down. this is not a race, I don't need to 'git 'er done!'. I need to stop eating something so it won't go to waste. I couldn't tell you how many times I've eaten something that I don't enjoy, just so it won't end up in the garbage. I AM NOT A GARBAGE. I will savour what I eat. I will enjoy it on a whole new level. I am not going to eat lima beans though, I never will. Lima beans, mushrooms and tofu. These are all, and will always be, on my DO NOT EAT LIST.